tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-36561206316296001202011-07-08T07:27:32.772+01:00Infrequent ramblings about life, faith, and love. Part of my weak attempt to discern the right (and narrow) path.Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.comBlogger371100tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-84189613104006059972009-11-21T11:23:00.002Z2009-11-21T11:45:21.608Z

I've just finished my first week in a job that I have been planning for the greater part of this year, if not longer. I'm mentally exhausted, which I keep reminding myself is totally normal after the first week of a job. It was an interesting week and I just need to say that I am so deeply grateful that I have this Saturday morning to myself, to sit in my bed with a strong smooth cup of Starbucks

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-34369815127932378942009-11-04T00:22:00.003Z2009-11-04T00:44:46.747Z

Last week I went to Confession for the first time in over a year. I have been meaning to go for awhile, literally months, but I've obviously not made it enough of an effort. I do take it very seriously, so part of me not going was due to the fact that preparing for it can be draining and exhausting if one truly does a thorough examination of conscience.Regardless, last week I was led to the

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-61584079452635159732009-10-24T23:58:00.002+01:002009-10-25T00:43:34.010+01:00

“A person often meets his destiny on the road he took to avoid it.” - Jean de la FontaineThis quote struck me not because of any particular "destiny" that I myself am trying to avoid, but it does help reflect on the importance of conscious choices that we make. It reminds of times when I was trying to avoid certain people or situations in general, yet I would ultimately come face to face them. I

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-34142194730786747372009-09-22T07:05:00.001+01:002009-09-22T07:08:04.687+01:00

A good article on humility at catholic.orgExcerpt:Here’s what I suspect: much of what I think are the evidences of humility in my life are really something else entirely. There’s an ongoing skirmish between a desire for holiness (tainted with pride), discouragement over failings (tainted with pride) and goals of using my talents in the best way possible ~ for God’s glory of course. (Also tainted

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-31989801430786809462009-08-07T21:01:00.004+01:002009-08-07T21:23:34.250+01:00

Ever since he first appeared on the Colbert Report, Father James Martin, SJ, has been one of my favorite voices of faith and reason, combining worldly intelligence and credentials put to use serving God as a Jesuit priest. I mainly want to post the link to his story of conversion, as reported through his Alma Mater, the Wharton School of Business at U Penn. I came across this particular story in

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-9672524919318846032009-08-03T14:53:00.004+01:002009-08-03T15:12:03.842+01:00

A friend of a friend of mine just lost his mother. He is in his twenties and they have had a tumultuous relationship due to her decades-long alcoholism. He had just returned from living abroad for an extended period of time and had only been back for over a week. Their relationship had been strained and painful for him, and she was known and gossiped about as the town drunk.Then one morning, he

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-14715605380614208382009-08-02T16:31:00.002+01:002009-08-02T16:34:34.121+01:00

A Prayer by Teilhard de Chardin, via Ignatian Spirituality on Facebook.Above all, trust in the slow work of God.We are quite naturally impatient in everythingto reach the end without delay.We should like to skip the intermediate stages.We are impatient of being on the wayto something unknown,something new.Yet it is the law of all progress that is madeby passing through some stages of

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-39439025313400376452009-07-13T00:04:00.003+01:002009-07-13T00:18:41.746+01:00

Thoughtful video on My Catholic Voice. They give useful tips for prayer in the ignation tradition, describing prayer as our response to God's invitation to communicate with us. A tip so that we won't overlook moments of grace in our lives: "Set aside time for prayer. If you don't put the discipline upon yourself for prayer, if you don't respond to that invitation from God, a lot of ways God

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-15904549477903699072009-07-04T01:49:00.001+01:002009-07-04T01:52:37.335+01:00

"For My thoughts are not your thoughts,Nor are your ways My ways," declares the LORD."For as the heavens are higher than the earth,So are My ways higher than your waysAnd My thoughts than your thoughts." -Isaiah 55:8-9

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-32943802460293677172009-06-21T23:11:00.001+01:002009-06-21T23:12:58.131+01:00

An Act of AbandonmentO my God, I thank you and I praiseyou for accomplishing your holyand all-lovable will without any regard for mine.With my whole heart,in spite of my heart,do I receive this cross I feared so much!It is the cross of Your choice,the cross of Your love.I venerate it;nor for anything in the worldwould I wish that it had not come,since You willed it.I keep it with gratitude and

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-47382199333495092252009-06-15T22:48:00.003+01:002009-06-15T22:59:52.134+01:00

I resolved the situation with the ex by challenging my horrible communication skills, namely my use of sarcasm used as a defense mechanism. There's a fantastic book that helped me out of addiction and unimaginably low self-esteem in my teen years by Dr. David D. Burns called The Feeling Good Handbook. I highly recommend it. It breaks down why we have communication barriers and what we can do to

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-79767770356748999182009-06-14T23:11:00.003+01:002009-06-14T23:22:19.665+01:00

One week ago, an ex added me on Facebook. The background is that this is an ex who I haven't spoken to in two years. Though we only dated for a few months, it was extremely intense and the breakup was painful. We had an instant connection to each other. We parted ways with no hope of a future together because (even though neither of us would say it because we knew that it would really end

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-34622247654459525092009-06-13T15:50:00.007+01:002009-06-13T16:08:32.694+01:00

I could swear that I have heard this story before, but re-reading it today gave me the inspiration I needed. It's on Beliefnet and it's about an atheist who found God after getting cancer, which forced him to reconcile with his family. It drives home the point to me that, although the professor had tried to get a message through to Tommy, seemingly in vain, it was not until he let go that God was

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-6478314462092742792009-06-12T22:20:00.003+01:002009-06-12T22:40:50.050+01:00

This is my third or fourth night in a row where I've had less than four hours of sleep. I've continued to have energy during the day and I am fully functional, but in all honesty, I think this is a result of the ex re-entering the picture. I've been stressed, anxious, angry, hopeful, smitten, nostalgic, eager, excited, contemplative, weak, and strong. My mind has raced me through all these nights

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-77187898246977587732009-06-11T23:31:00.004+01:002009-06-11T23:38:17.711+01:00

Jesus looked upon them and said, "With man this is impossible, but not with God; all things are possible with God."- Mark 10:27Sometimes I just need a reminder.*

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-72527576516209003062009-06-11T22:49:00.004+01:002009-06-12T22:20:07.833+01:00

I went on a long walk today to try and clear my head and I stumbled upon a church in which I have never been. It was a long church, only one person praying quietly in there at the time, and I went around to visit the different statues of the saints. I came upon the statue of the Sacred Heart of Jesus and found, coincidentally, that today is the first day of the Novena. The theme is,"Christ is

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-60566630192420566222009-06-07T23:57:00.002+01:002009-06-08T00:19:44.303+01:00

Everything that has been troubling me lately - work, visas, etc - came to a head last week. Everything has worked out very well in my favour. I am no longer stressed and I am confident that I am in a good place, right where I need to be. My career looks like it will pick up in the next few months and I was beginning to look forward to a bright and peachy summer. Then today, out of the blue, I

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-14782491871934224662009-05-20T23:06:00.001+01:002009-05-20T23:11:44.482+01:00

Henri Nouwen on Peace: Here we touch one of the greatest dangers that face peacemakers: that peacemakers themselves become the victims of the evil forces they are trying to overcome. The same fear of "the enemy" that leads warmakers to war can begin to affect the peacemaker who sees the warmaker as "the enemy." Words of anger and hostility can gradually enter into the language of the peacemaker.

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-46472078830127528972009-05-16T10:54:00.001+01:002009-05-16T10:56:41.713+01:00

I have watched this video many times because I like the music, but this morning it made me weep.

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-46078007204834809152009-05-11T23:35:00.005+01:002009-05-11T23:47:32.357+01:00

Today I spoke to a reasonable man from the Visas section who said that I should have no problem getting an extension on my current visa. I hope so! That would allow me to work another job as well! Plus, my mom said that this incredibly good-looking man that we noticed in Church at Christmas time - accompanying his mother - has been showing up at the evening Mass. My sister might make an

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-40393920695133100442009-05-09T14:50:00.002+01:002009-05-09T14:57:28.057+01:00

After a recent job interview went less than stellar (to say the least), this excerpt frmo Fr. Ciszek is appropriate:Be thankful then... that God in his loving care sends humiliations your way... It was the same God who arranged for (joy) in order to strengthen and console you and who has now arranged your abrupt and humiliating departure from the scene to remind you once more that all things on

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-12713213820313286002009-05-08T00:03:00.003+01:002009-05-09T14:50:05.448+01:00

I was out with friends from work tonight. One of my Scottish friends was telling me that she had an instinct that I wouldn't be leaving. That something would be pulled out of a hat and that I would stay. I suppose I had already planned to stay, but without a real job prospect. But she did say that she had a very strong feeling about that. I hope so.My plan is to find out about alternative types

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-51952141916219213912009-05-01T10:50:00.003+01:002009-05-01T11:07:22.094+01:00

Last Saturday or Sunday, I felt certain about the direction in which my fate was about to unroll. I was to up and leave my current home and head back to mom's house on another continent. In a way, this was part of my preparation for the "worst-case scenario" and had less to do with me feeling certain about the outcome than it had to do with me just craving certainty. Living in a state of limbo

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-49258901147755300992009-04-24T10:26:00.002+01:002009-04-24T10:31:30.438+01:00

So it looks like my so-called "worst fears" are coming true. Not only will I be unemployed next week but I will also have to relocate to my home country. Ok. The tears flew down my face and I felt anger towards the whole "system", but how can I question God's will? We do not know what he wants for us. A part of Fr. Walter Ciszek's book He Leadeth Me brought me this wisdom:Each day, every day of

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-46720466181096543142009-04-22T09:49:00.006+01:002009-08-08T06:27:05.820+01:00

Something odd happened to me last night. I was reading an interview with Matt Baglio on Beliefnet a journalist who has just put out a book about exorcism. He describes an experience he had after viewing part of an exorcism of a woman who was cursing the Virgin Mary, about whom the priest said had helped the woman greatly. So the journalist said a prayer to Mary, and shortly thereafter, a strong

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-43340589323179274232009-03-21T10:18:00.002Z2009-03-21T10:35:47.833Z

Yesterday I experienced some of the worst feelings of anxiety when my fears about the future appeared to be confirmed. Not mortal fears, but employment. I may have to return to my homeland since the employment situation here in the Emerald Isle continues to contract, with just over a month left on my current permit. There is still a chance for me though... but under the circumstances, which I

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-63251477089307672982009-03-16T11:25:00.002Z2009-03-16T11:40:28.928Z

From Henri Nouwen:There was nothing spectacular about Jesus' life. Far from it! Even when you look at Jesus' miracles, you find that he did not heal or revive people in order to get publicity. He frequently forbade them even to talk about it. His resurrection too was a hidden event. Only his disciples and a few of the women and men who had known him intimately before his death saw him as the

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-55470654154274846452009-03-16T10:28:00.003Z2009-03-16T10:31:42.513Z

Here is a excerpt from an interview with the Dominican Priest that I had linked to previously. The question was about feeling certainty over his decision to become a priest:I will never forget the moment when I finally said yes in my heart. I was in my little studio apartment in St. Louis, sitting there with my books, like a lot of grad student geeks, and I was thinking about my whole life, women

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-30281018462481413882009-03-12T13:19:00.005Z2009-05-01T10:49:59.219+01:00

I managed to go one full day yesterday without any chocolate. I felt great. I felt so great, I felt like rewarding myself with chocolate. I didn't, but I loved how my mind-body connection is a mess of contradictions. My Lenten sacrifice was to give up chocolate and over the past two weeks, for the most part I have considerably cut down and I am glad to say that I am making progress towards

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-79830946500563973442009-03-11T23:38:00.001Z2009-03-11T23:41:25.235Z

From Conversion Diary, an interview with Dominican Friar, Br. James Dominic Brent, O.P.:The story of how I knew I was called to be a priest, and the story of how I lost my faith and found it again, are basically the same story. Finding one's vocation and finding one's God are the same movement of the heart. Discernment and conversion are two ways of looking at the same movement toward God.This

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-2376962029017359082009-03-08T11:06:00.004Z2009-03-08T23:03:49.383Z

A few ideas have been running through my head about the future, which have urged me towards the practice of discernment. Since I have been struggling with my faith, this is obviously going to be a challenge. I have to remember how and when to discern. As I recall, St. Ignatius of Loyola has been the definitive voice for learning how to discern God's word. I found an article about it here:Before

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-36801372772942102952009-03-07T22:02:00.001Z2009-03-08T23:06:53.479Z

I want to record a passage from a small book I picked up at the library today, "Questions and Answers", by Pope Benedict XVI. It contains a section whereby youth ask questions pertaining to the practice of faith in their lives. A 17-year-old asks:We are often led to believe that knowledge and faith are each other's enemies; that knowledge and technology are the same thing; that it was through

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-68567507203604827452009-03-06T10:50:00.000Z2009-03-06T10:59:20.129Z

“My God, I desire with all my heart to do Your holy will, I submit in all things and absolutely to Your good pleasure for time and eternity; and I wish to do this, Oh my God, for two reasons; first: because You are my Sovereign Lord and it is but just that Your will should be accomplished; secondly: because I am convinced by faith, and by experience that Your will is in all things as good and

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-10320797316616915892009-03-04T01:07:00.001Z2009-03-04T01:08:16.741Z

Found out about "Signal Graces" and the Rosary. I prayed the rosary last night and I was happy to do so. But I think it's the explanation I was looking for - about intuition. More tomorrow, have to say the Sorrowful mysteries before bed.

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-83937684261776590612009-03-01T12:27:00.000Z2009-03-01T13:16:40.323Z

I saw this prayer in Henri Nouwen's book, "Show Me the Way: Readings for Each Day of Lent". It is about serving God as the number one commandment, with all your heart, soul, and mind. Father, I abandon myself into your hands;do with me what you will.Whatever you may do, I thank you;I am ready for all, I accept all. Let only your will be done in me,and in all your creatures. I wish no more than

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-63842471366448966802009-02-28T16:11:00.000Z2009-03-01T12:26:10.231Z

It is just a few days into Lent and I have already failed in my abstinence of chocolate, and my prayers haven't been that consistent. But this is a path of growth, I have to remind myself. I came across a quote today that summed up what I was trying to explain in my first post. Lorna Byrne, an Irish woman who communicates with angels (...yes... i know, I'll return to that) offered spiritual

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-3656120631629600120.post-76256420944495117872009-02-22T18:30:00.000Z2009-02-22T18:48:54.503Z

It is the Sunday before Lent and I am preparing my heart for the next 40 days, where I will attempt to bring myself closer to God.I have lost a great sense of my spirituality in recent months, or even almost years, I received a quiet rekindling of spirit on a recent pilgrimage. I could sense myself pushing it away, maybe because I don't know if I am ready for the consequences of allowing God, or

Shylockhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13288392771732022345noreply@blogger.com1