It is just a few days into Lent and I have already failed in my abstinence of chocolate, and my prayers haven't been that consistent. But this is a path of growth, I have to remind myself.
I came across a quote today that summed up what I was trying to explain in my first post. Lorna Byrne, an Irish woman who communicates with angels (...yes... i know, I'll return to that) offered spiritual advice to a publisher named Jonathan Black on his website that rang true:
Lorna Byrne has been advising me on my spiritual practice. She tells me how, if we persist, parts of ourselves are enlivened by it and continue to pray after we've - consciously - stopped.
I recall that when I habitually prayed, and prayed with the heart, it had that same effect on me. It was like I was seeing the world through a new set of lenses, set in a much deeper tone. But the prayer had to be with faith and I remember feeling the rewards of it.
Similarly, he adds that Rudolf Steiner's advised that conscious work over 21 days creates permanent change in the etheric body.
Now, I'm not entirely sure what Steiner means by "etheric body" but I'm going to look into his work. Even just the title of one of his books, "Intuitive Thinking as a Spiritual Path", seems to match my own experience of developing my intuition and spirituality.
My hard heart is my main obstacle. It is a lack of strong burning faith, and it is difficult for me to pray meaningfully and make sacrifices if the foundation of my faith isn't that strong. Did Jesus rise from the dead? Is that the question I should be pursuing?